Join this interactive, free monthly workshop dedicated to improving on important relationships and your own awareness and well-being.

What if you could find ways to interrupt old patterns of friction or even conflict, and instead find a way to understand and be understood, creating peace and connection instead?

I remember hearing one member of a couple say to the other "I feel that you are an idiot!" after being requested to use "I" statements and express feelings. Of course, that is a fairly extreme example of following the letter of the instructions but not the spirit.

We are always challenged in life to find ways to connect with genuine feelings and insights that welcome other people in, rather than blaming or shaming them.

There is no single formula for good communication. However, when we are genuine with other people, it encourages authenticity, and people start to truly understand and appreciate each other's feelings and needs. That leads to better relating and an ability to work out solutions.

A more genuine statement than the above example might have been "I am feeling very frustrated, and I am not sure why I feel that way, but I think that you are responsible for my bad feeling!" Two important differences are: 1) it expresses a feeling--frustration, and 2) it makes transparent that the speaker is attributing responsibility to the other person.

Why these two shifts are helpful is part of the topic of effective communication, dispute resolution, and ultimately improving and saving of relationships. The goal in good communication is that all parties in the process can feel seen and heard, and come out with a stronger, positive connection to others.

The event is facilitated by David B. Alexander, LP. In it, we will apply Nonviolent Communication to issues or questions that the attendees bring in, and David will facilitate the dialogue. If there are not enough issues or questions brought by attendees, there will be sample situations provided for discussion.

Violent communication can show itself in subtle ways that are hardly noticed, so the word "violent" might be surprising. However, the theme is that violent communication tends to disrupt empathy and relationships, while nonviolent communication is a win/win kind of communication that brings people together.

Nonviolent Communication is an approach to communication and relationships that is based on empathic connection, but that also provides a clear description and understanding of what kinds of communication help bring more joy and vitality into life, and what kinds of communication prolong conflict or separation.

As a psychotherapist, David has seen the great value of these principles, and has guided numerous couples and individuals to improve the quality of their communication and their relationships.

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Note: it is recommended that people have their video / camera on during our session to asist in having more connection with others, although it remains optional and can be turned on and off as suits the needs of the participant.

The workshop meeting will take place online via Zoom. The meeting can be joined via ordinary phone, but for a full experience use of a computer will allow seeing all participants more easily.

Join me for an online, interactive introduction to Zen and Buddhism: the Middle Way, Four Noble Truths, Eightfold Path, and Three Treasures. We will also discuss how to integrate the wisdom and energy of Zen and Buddhism into modern life. There is no fee for this event.

The lotus flower rises invisibly through mud and muddy water, and opens up pure and clean despite its history and surroundings. If we can keep on the right path while in the middle of activity and challenges, we can finally drop struggles of the past and live a life of true freedom and compassion.

The topics include a basic short history of Buddhism, primary principles (see below), the impact of Zen, and integration with modern life.

The principles and concepts that are covered are:

The Middle Way: a crucial piece of understanding for maintaining one's balance and staying on a healthy and effective path towards self-knowledge.

The Four Noble Truths: these address the root meaning of Buddhism: an understanding that life not lived well is ultimately full of inadequacy and pain, but that with a right understanding and effort, we move towards being free of suffering, while helping life on this planet be more humane and awakened.

The Eightfold Path: addresses in a specific manner the key components for living the best possible life, a life that benefits self and others, that reduces suffering, and that leads to liberation.

The Three Treasures: concerns the elements that support following the path towards awakening and liberation.

We will also examine the direct expression used in Zen and how it captures the emotion and wisdom of life without using religious references, and will talk about how to see Zen and Buddhism as a modern teaching.

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The teacher, David B. Alexander, has practiced Zen since 1970, with teachers at the New York Zen Center in the 1970s and 1980s, and most recently has been active at the Zen Mountain Monastery in Mt. Tremper, NY. He has also been practicing and teaching Tai Chi Chuan, a mind / body practice, since 1978, and is an active psychotherapist using gestalt therapy, psychoanalysis, and nonviolent communication in his work with individuals and couples.

Note: if any attendee does not wish to join in the discussion after the presentation, but prefers to observe and absorb, that preference will be respected.

The webinar meeting will take place online via Zoom. The webinar can be joined via ordinary phone, but for a full experience use of a computer will allow observing other attendees and those who are speaking.

Join this interactive, intensive online workshop dedicated to improving on important relationships and your own awareness and well-being.

SIGN UP HERE

We will be meeting in four sessions of two hours each, on successive Saturdays from 11am to 1pm ET beginning Saturday January 11th. The fee of $120 includes 8 stimulating hours of interactive practice and training. Start the new year right!

What if you could find ways to interrupt old patterns of friction or even conflict, and instead find a way to understand and be understood, creating peace and connection instead?

I remember hearing one member of a couple say to the other "I feel that you are an idiot!" after being requested to use "I" statements and express feelings. Of course, that is a fairly extreme example, but we are always challenged in life with find ways to connect with genuine feelings and insights that welcome in other people rather than blaming or shaming them.

There is no single formula for good communication. However, when we are genuine with other people, it encourages mutual authenticity, and people start to truly understand and appreciate each other's feelings and needs. That leads to better relating and to enjoyment of working out win/win choices.

A more genuine statement than the above example might have been "I am feeling very frustrated, and I am not sure why I feel that way, but when you refused to talk about your action I felt very lonely!" Two important differences are: 1) it expresses feelings--frustration and loneliness, and 2) it makes transparent that the speaker is attributing some responsibility to the other person's action. Why these two shifts are helpful is part of the topic of effective communication, dispute resolution, and ultimately improving and saving of relationships.

The goal in good communication is that all parties in the process can be seen and heard, and come out with a stronger, positive connection to others.

The event is facilitated by David B. Alexander, LP. In it, we will apply Nonviolent Communication to issues or questions that the attendees bring in, and David will facilitate the dialogue. If there are not enough issues or questions brought by attendees, there will be sample situations provided for discussion.

Here are the four themes for the four weeks, although there will be more in each meeting:

• The Nourishment of Feelings and Needs
• Wisdom in Making Observations and Requests
• Breaking Free from Programmed Responses
• Finding Richness in Difficult Conversations
  

Violent communication can show itself in subtle ways that are hardly noticed, so the word "violent" might be surprising. However, the theme is that violent communication tends to disrupt empathy and relationships, while nonviolent communication is win/win communication that brings people together.

Nonviolent Communication is an approach to communication and relationships that is based on empathic connection, but that also provides a clear description and understanding of what kinds of communication help bring more joy and vitality into life, and what kinds of communication prolong conflict or separation.

As a psychotherapist, David has seen the great value of these principles, and has guided numerous couples and individuals to improve the quality of their communication and their relationships.

SIGN UP HERE

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The workshop meeting will take place online via Zoom. The meeting can be joined via ordinary phone, but for a full experience use of a computer will allow seeing all participants more easily.